Can it really be my turn to Harvest?

Fall is truely not my holiday. I like when the leaves change, the cool breezes blow in....and bring pollen from the north and make my allergies go crazy! LOL This is truely the favorite holiday of a counter partner, Coach K! As I pondered on what I was going to blog on today, after a conversation with an "ol friend" yesterday, I was reminded that there are adversities that we go through, we certainly don't deserve, however, there comes a time in our adversity when we realize it truely has come to a balanced place of life where it is OK for us to realize, we just might be in the "Harvest" time. A time of reaping all that we have sown.......seeds of faithfulness when we didn't feel like being that, merciful when maybe there really wasn't enough mercy to extend anymore, love when maybe the love felt like it had ran out........faith, can't even go there.......and HOPE? When it seems like all hope is lost, you emerge out of your muck something much stronger then you ever thought you could be. I don't beleive I have ever looked at "harvest time" in this manner, but for some reason the inspiration of my blog reminded me yesterday, that maybe the adversity we don't "DESERVE" however, if you work hard at SEED TIME......THEN MAYBE EVERYONE DESERVES HARVEST TIME.

As I seached photos online to epict this time of year, as to not steal the glorious thunder of the FALL season from Coach K, I thought, just maybe I do deserve the harvest of the planting and seed time this past 10 months. I have learned so much these past 10 months about myself, how others see me, how I see my family, how I need to accept certain things and ways in my life that they just are. I would have loved to fix everything for everyone, however, a lifetime of trying to attempt the change, never works, only when I need to change me does it work. So, as my most favorite time of the year approaches, rather quickly I might add, I am going to embrace every day of the Harvest time. It seems amazing that a year has flown by, and for a while thought it left me behind, however in my reflection, its the contrary, it has not left me behind.......as I came up for air, I saw the fruit this time, the bountiful harvest of all that I had planted. Well I am exaggerating, it is not really bountiful, but it will be.....and that is my optimism talking!

The abundance of wisdom once said there are seasons for everything under the sun. A time to be born, a time to die, time for laughter a time for tears, a time to mourn a time to dance, a time to tear a time to mend, a time to plant and there truely is a time for harvest. It was not footloose or the beatles either! I am going to accept that this is my time for all the positive things, Dance, Mend, Plant, Keep, Love, Leace, Build and just plain ol' LIVE!!!!! (Eccloesiastes 3)

Bloggers/Readers I hope that this Fall season you find your bountiful harvest. Where ever it is coming from, it doesn't matter, we all deserve to partake in the bountiful fruit of our labors of planting time. Enjoy your harvest time......and always remembering that adversity is never easy, but it builds such character and vision that when you are on the other side, you will be able to see the abundance of your fruits waiting for you. Enjoy all that God has for you.......in the place you are at today. Until next time everyone! Happy Blogging/Reading!

Breaking the Chain of Behavior

In this mornings message, during live stream, Pastor spoke to the men after a wonderful mens meeting last night. Message was about how as women we sometimes don't trust our men to really be able to lead our families, like we think it should be led, which means sometimes we have a tendancy of just doing it ourselves. He talked about how sometimes, behaviors or learned traits from our granparents, parents make our behaviors or habits remain the same. Unless someone in the generational pool breaks those chains of behavior it will continue from one generation to another.

He spoke about the "Walters" history of alcholic and how my dearest granpa broke the chain and said for me and my house we will serve the Lord. My granpa was Irish and my granma was Hungarian. We all know that the Irish are famous for, yep you got it a temper. Now, I can blame forever, my ancestors and the reasons that I do things, and not be accountable for my own actions. What Pastor was saying is that generationally all of us can decide to break the history of what is set before us and make the necessary changes to be different for our own families and our own selves and children. I can fly off the handle and be angry and say, you have to put up with it, after all I am Irish and I can not help it. But like my granpa I need to say, even though I am Irish, I can make efforts not to hurt people with my words. I can just like my father, say, I will not allow the chains of my family history designate who I will grow old like. I will change my destiny and be different with His help.

I am reading a book and this book has made me really think alot and do some serious soul searching, I have realized that some of my behaviors I have tried to not be the blame, however, this morning's message was the confirmation that I needed to OWN THEM AND CHANGE THEM as accountability for the part that I play. I have noticed in my own soul searching that if I change and break free from some of these chains that really bind me, I would be a freer person. I would like myself just a little bit more. Change, we have talked about before goes against human nature, however, change always starts with the one inside.

We all have those things in our life that so easily sets us back.......but when you see it and realize it, never blaming why it is there or how it got there....but just saying, I need to change that. I need to react different, I need to let God help me with that......only then can we truely start becoming the person inside that we want to be. Today's rainy day led me to blog once again and we all know that my pattern of blogging is usually inspired by something, someone or something someone says. This morning's ponderings inspired me to blog once again, thanks Pastor. :-)

Some things we struggle with we have to just Ask Him to help us control. But it is just like any thing that we need to change, we always have to start by recognizing it and how much of a better person we would be not only to others, but to ourselves without the Chain holding us back. So, bloggers and readers, if you too are struggling with a chain keeping you from being the free person you want to be. Work on it daily, and remember, when you have decided to change something expect that you will be tested in that area.........that is just the nature of the beast.....so be prepared. Happy Blogging everyone UNTIL!

To Fly or Crash?

Life Quotes

Been a while since I have been on any site socially or blogged......sometimes we all have to take a time out......and just reflect on ourselves......but back I think in the swing of stuff and slowly will get back to the social part of life. These past 9 months have been challenging and sometimes I do feel like the bird that is supposed to fly, but this quote spoke to me today that unless I am prepared to crash, I will never truly fly.

I think that has been my life.........that I was really stuck in the crashing part......and lost the confidence in the flying part!!! I have realized these past few weeks.....that I am soring above the clouds once again in life in general. I think when we reach a place on our path or jouney in life, we know we can fly......but soring just does no come as easy as it could. I have truely found much strength in others on this journey who like me preceeded before me and they too found strength and have overcome many obsticals.

It amazes me that my last posting was in July, and here I sit embarking on to the month of October already....another year just flew right by....pardon the pun! There are many things that I looked forward to the upcoming summer season.....boating, scalloping, jet-setting, tanning but it will be there next summer. Here we will still hsve some warm days left.....and I think that this week.....with the forcast of only 20% chance of rain, I will embrace a day and take to the open water. As being on the open water always makes my mind and soul happy! I have been in project after project and will slow down this fall and take in some of the important things of life. People, Friends, sharing and being there for those in need, as my friends and family have been for me.

Blogger and Readers, many of you, have been the mainstay in my survival and I hope that I can be here for each and every one of you if ever you need a helping hand. I am glad to be back among the living and the social. SO readers/bloggers, if you are embracing the fall season, remember, We are all on this jouney together, plugging along at our own pace. So, what ever you are going through, I hope that you remember, you are never alone, there is always someone out there, who has been where you are......to encourage you, lift you up and be your support. Until Next Time.....Happy Flying crashing is always optional.......I pray for you a soft landing!

How easy would it be to Just Say NO!

I was chatting to a friend yesterday and she said why can't I just say no!??? We all know my pattern and it got me "pondering" that my life feels so overwhelmed and mostly is my own doing! I too, and a victum of I just can't say NO!

I know I have to be the only one...just me and my friend guilty as charged.........to take on more then the average bear because I can't say the easy to say two letter word NO!

Where in my confidence center of my brain do I have to reprogram this should be easy adjustment of saying NO instead of always smiling and saying SURE you can, sure I can.......sure that's ok.......sure we can.......sure it's ok......of course I have time for that....No I didn't have any plans.......Of course I will not be overwhelmed?? Anyone out there feeling me????

I guess it takes all kinds of people to make the world go around.....there are the ones out there that don't care to make things happen....then there are the ones who are the movers and the shakers of the world.....and I guess those people do make things happen....and mostly they are the ones that can't say no!

Reading a new book....and learning that emotional boundaries are very important in this journey we call life.....and sometimes, saying NO is as healthy as always saying YES!

It is easier said then done.........I am an over committer? Is that even a word? Is that even possible.........over acheiver maybe a better thing to say about myself. Sometimes, it gets me in trouble though and those are the times I am trying to learn that I have to put up better boundaries in my emotional part of my life......NO! Repeat after me..................NO! HHHHAAA sounds funny as it is not a word I use much unless with my teenage daughters and doggies! HHHHAAA I can say it to them........very firmly and quickly but in my personal life....it does comes a little hard for me. I think that sometimes, I would not feel as disappointed in myself if I would learn to let it roll off my tongue easier with other people as I do with my dogs.....they would probably say, "Mom doesn't have a hard time saying that at all....she tells it to me all the time!"

So maybe today needs to be a day for me.......that I realize it more today then ever......and just incase you wondering....NO I am not overwhelmed!!!! HHHAAAA that I need to stand up a little more for myself...and practice saying NO when it is just easier to just say YES or OK.........or let other just assume that YEs is always gonna be the answer...maybe the shock of NO sometimes will keep me in check.

I wrote on my tile last night......tomorrow will be a new day....with a new attitude.....so let the day begin! New day......is here....and new attitude will start now! So I will put into practice today.....when things come my way....my new philosophy of saying NO when really, it would be easier to just say YES or give in!

So bloggers/readers....if you too struggle with this, it will have to be a conscience effort on your part....cuz it like anything else, sometimes, easier to blog then to do! So until next time.....I hope that you too can accomplish this....and like anything else, we have to do it one day at a time! Happy Blogging Everyone! UNTIL!

New Day, New Hope

Woke up today.....and the rain is falling seems like all around me......Inside and out! It has been a roller coaster week....and I guess, the dawn of tomorrow is that a new day, will certainly bring NEW HOPE!

There comes a place in every situation where you have to truely accept where you are and where others are and also accept that some things might never change.

You can only change yourself. We have talked about this in previous blogs and Coach K has rang this true, but today, I really think that I got it. It is not easy to accept when you want a situation to change to how you want it, but that is not what the other person in the situation wants. You must both be on the same page.

What happens, when you are not both on the same page? Then you have to accept it as that, and you both have to agree to disagree. If you can do that, then, just maybe you can begin to heal and go on.

Tomorrow was a deadline, that for me, I put in my boundary list. So, accepting after one month, 30 days to create a new habit, 30 days to break a habit, tomorrow being day 31, I will accept the things that I can not change, I will say the serenity prayer, and I will look for new hope for a new day.

I beleive that this past 30 days, that I am the one who has changed. I have found some strength that I know God has been preparing me for. The strength from the trials and testings but all in all, I know, that I am the one who has changed, for the good. I am learning that I too, deserve all that God has for me. I deserve the best in life and I will only obtain those things if I hold out, reach for them and don't settle for anything less then what I want.

Maybe it is, sometimes, that we are the ones that change and when everyone else stays on the page that you left, then really, you are the one to blame for moving away? I have blamed that it was not me that changed but am facing the reality, that it is. I can not accept things the way they have always been, therefore, I am the one who realized that those ways were not how I saw my life in the long term. Why did it seem to work and why did I seem to settle for such a long time, but now, all the sudden it doesn't work for me? What happened to me that I changed and wanted something different then what has been there all along? Not sure why, but the fact remains that I too, am an individual, I have feelings, passions, goals, emotional drives too that seem to be leading me a different direction now. They have always been there I guess, I guess I thought that I was OK without them being a big part of my life, but have accepted that to have those things, means, I have to be the one to change. I think I am ok with that today!

One of the first moves of acceptance is to not blame anyone, but to accept the fact that you might be the one who has just changed into a different direction. It is not always a bad thing, it is what you make it. Accept how you are, respect how others are. If you are no longer on the same page, maybe that is ok, maybe you both will be better, accepting that you can be happy, knowing the other page doesn't work for you, your page doesn't work for them, but individually, it will work itself out. Life always does. It stops for no one! Time is an amazing thing. It never really heals the hurt, it just softens the hurt. So as time goes on, it will be easier to view and I will look back, like most everything else in my life, and know, that the choices I have made are honored by God and I know, that this is the best place for me on my journey.

So bloggers and readers alike, if you too, are making life changing choices, or if others are making those choices for you, then accept it this week. Challenges will certainly come.....but rely on Him, He will see you through........because, tomorrow is a new day.......and it will bring....closure....and NEW HOPE! Bring it on Day 1.......beginning of hopefully, something new. UNTIL!

What we could do if we had!!??????

The last few blogs of mine have been about challenges, storms, valleys........it made me wonder today if I do have any great things that happen to me!??? Well, today, I landed a new adventure.......a new p/t job that will allow me to pour some of my skills into a different place and possibly boost a little "CONFIDENCE" from within! It really has always been there....but I think that the every day buffeting of my life....has weighed me down....and left me feeling the lack of.........lack of alot.....but mostly the hold you head up high........without the mask.....confidence....that I can.......do anything. What we could truely accomplish if we didn't have anything to stand in our way!

A wonderful dear friend for many years......messaged me today and encouraged me that the "path of trial and challenge" may feel long.....but her encouraging words was that there is always an end....and it will be a good end no matter what.....not evil! This woman is a woman of God......and someone that I honor and have looked up to since I was a little girl! Her words of great wisdom rang in my ears tonight as I sang to the radio, painting and cleaning floors......I would have rathered been out for the evening.....but stuff must get done.....so another lonely night home alone......but as I was singing.....and I caught myself......I pondered on my new week ahead.....really one must start at the next day ahead....but I know that this little job will be just what the dr. ordered!

I am looking for the confidence of the LION even with an otter's personality....I know....that deep down it is always there....and it will be there when I need to grab ahold of it....and today was the day. As I put into practice some old skills that I have not had to use for a while......it all came right back to me! It felt so good for someone else to actually have confidence in me......and they really don't even know me! It made my day!

So today, was the day......that I said in my blog yesterday and maybe that is what God needed to hear from me.......the allowing him.....to be incontrol even when I feel buffeted.....I accepted the fact that HE is not done with me....molding me as a person, a new person and building new wonderful character in me........and when you give into it....with that faith.....then.........Maybe that it when he chooses to calm the storm after all!

Maybe that is what HE is trying to teach me through all of this! It is soooooo hard for me not to be in the FIX IT mode! BUT I am learning Coach K! It will get through my thick head sooner or later...I hope sooner so the waves will stop beating me up! LOL

Well Readers/bloggers......this was a short blog, but a happy blog. A confidence booster was found by me today....and maybe just what I needed to finish the race......I have gotten tired at this end of the path...but never a time to give up.....just keep pressing through. So if you too are being buffeted.......and challenges are hitting you every day.....take encouragment like I did today, in an email from a friend, a blog, a job, your little kid picking a flowey for you, the simple things of life....just might have the hidden answers of life.......the reason for the challenges and trials....is always to make you strong and smart! I take back.....I never want to be the dumb one! I am happy to be the STRONG one! UNTIL next time! Happy Blogging Everyone~have a great weekend.

Challenges Make us Smarter.......?????

I was texting a friend the other day....and she said to me....that her day was extremely challenging. I responded by saying.....philisophical like....."how challenges make us smarter and stronger....and her texted reply was.......Well, I think I am ready to just be dumb for a while! It made me laugh yet at the same time.....it made me ponder...how true it was...that challenges and adversity does make us smarter and wiser.......and in many cases stronger but it just seems like maybe can we choose not to be smart today if that means the challenges have to come our way?

I have been in a very challenging place in my life for over a year now....and I keep waiting for the SMARTNESS to set in.........and the STRONG but the challenges keep coming...like the storm I guess.........I opted today when my day began to be the DUMMY for the day.....but I beleive that since it is the end of the day, I have truely survived another day, not to mention did anyone see the size of the full moon??? And that maybe tomorrow just might be another challenging day...and maybe God is really wanting me to be the smartest and strongest girl out there for a reason!



Which brings me to FAITH! Certain of what we do not see! WOW! I guess that is my answer....just because I have daily challenges that I do not understand, it is the FAITH of what I hope for..........and the confidence of knowing that God has me here for a purpose even if I don't see it. I think choosing to be a dummy for the day is the best answer, but am too learning that my answers, though they seem simple and easy......and might I add Lord, CHALLENGE FREE, are not always His answers! I know He has a plan.......I know HIS goal for me.....and my goals are not the same.

As my life has changed just this past week.......and the adjustment to a new SUMMER schedule with Super G and the loss of my NatScat........as in my previous post.....this too shall pass.....and the sun will shine again tomorrow. I will embrace tomorrows dawn once again.....and accept that life surely may bring me just a few more challenges to handle......as I am ready for it........as every day before. I am expectant that I am not able to see past the bend in the road......and the struggle of the rocks and boulders on my path....however, they will NOT get the best of me!

Just like everything, Life is a CHOICE! SO BRING THEM ON those darn challenges....and I will tackle one at a time tomorrow. I will not complain anymore that LIFE is challenging cuz, I guess it is better then a boring life! I would probably complain about everything just going my way all the time right!!!!!????? NOT!!!!!!!!

So Bloggers / Readers, if you are in a place of challenges today or tomorrow.....today is almost history......and you can't change anything about history......it stays the same once the day has ended....BUT You can change how you handle the challenges of life that will come your way tomorrow. As they tackle you tomorrow remember, FAITH that God too has his plan.......just because you DO NOT SEE it....doesn't mean he doesn't have an awesome one for you too! SOOOOOO UNTIL next time everyone........Happy Blogging Everyone!